Singles Vs married

If you’re single, Satan is after you.

Okay, he’s after all of us, but there are some unique dangers in singleness — especially in unwanted singleness. He loves to deceive and discourage single people in the church and derail our devotion and ministry. But God intends to use you, your faith, your time, and your singleness in radical ways right now, as you are.

Perhaps the greatest temptation in singleness is to assume marriage will meet our unmet needs, solve our weaknesses, organize our lives, and unleash our gifts. Far from the solution, Paul makes marriage out to be a kind of problematic Plan B of Christian life and ministry. Marry if you must, but be warned, following Jesus is not easier when you join yourself to another sinner in a fallen world.

Therefore, for the not-yet married, our (temporary) singleness is a gift. It really is. If God leads you to marriage, you may never again know a time like the one you’re in right now. A season of singleness is not merely the minor leagues of marriage. It has the potential to be a unique period of undivided devotion to Christ and undistracted ministry to others.

Some pastors won’t allow singles to be ministry leaders based on 1 Timothy 3 and Titus 1 where it says leaders must be the husband of one wife, yet overlooking the fact that Jesus, Paul, and other apostles were single.  I have even seen how some married couples will avoid socializing with singles unless there is a crowd because they fear that the single person of the opposite sex will seduce their spouse and the single person of the same sex (especially men) will be a bad influence on their mate.  The truth is, there are many singles in the church who look for opportunities to reach out to others with the genuine selfless love of the Lord and desire to contribute the use of their spiritual gifts for the church’s benefit, but are held back by the prejudices of married Christians.  This not only hurts the church, but can greatly discourage the single believer.

Whether single, married with children, or married without children, every family unit faces struggles. Fortunately, Christians have the privileged of spiritual support system that they can turn to in times of need. The body of Christ works effectively as brothers and sisters care for one another. The bottom line is that we need to exercise the love that God commands us to in the Bible.  When we have to deal with worldly people every day and their evil ways, the church should be the one place that a Christian–single or married–should be greeted with acceptance and have the freedom to serve in whatever capacity God is leading them to.